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Submitted on
November 22, 2009
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Last night I saw the sky turn red.
The heavens heaved and all life bled
as meteors rained upon the world,
the cosmos' wrath raw and unfurled.
I could do naught but gaze wide-eyed
at cities razed and lives denied,
at trees ablaze and fields aflame.
When at long last I o'ercame
the fear that froze me to the ground,
I looked around and there I found
two lovers locked in tight embrace,
a blissful death etched on their face.

This life of ours 's a tawdry treasure,
for there's no meter that can measure
the tears that trickle and descend,
the meteors that have yet to land…
life is all
we have
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Moon-and-Ash Jan 3, 2010
You are consistently and compulsively thoughtfully readable. Too many adverbs exploding in that sentence. They happen when I get excited.

Rather than bleak, you've rendered the post-Apocalyptic with various measures of hope and affirmation. Incredible. :heart:
many, but not too many! :)

thank you so much! :heart:
Gorgeous. There's something about the image of a meteor that really moves me. I think it has something to do with indomitable power and horrible disaster; what force of nature is more destructive than a meteor? I'm sure one could be named, but that's not the point; this is just, I guess, a really roundabout and wordy way of saying "I like your poem, Len." xD
thank you very much, Vex! Glad to see you're back and I hope that you've been faring well!
PondDreamer Dec 13, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Beautiful, I love it :love:
This beautiful piece reminds me of the movie "The Fountain." Besides the beautifully painted imagery throughout the entire poem, there is an emotionality spilling from the lines. You have wonderfully juxtaposed fear and love--no, not the trivial love that could be more readily categorised as lust, but rather the true love in which two people join their very beings together. The last two lines of the first stanza:

two lovers locked in tight embrace,
a blissful death etched on their face.

Are so incredibly moving that they could almost stand on their own. However, when they are separated from the rest of the piece, they lose the power that they have to overwhelm the reader because the fear is not present. You greatly captured true love, which is inextricably connected to fear...the fear of living without the other; the fear of dying without the other.

Simply wonderful! +fav
thank you so much, Zach! :heart:
PulseofExistence Nov 29, 2009  Student Writer
You paint a picture in an old fashioned tongue that I see with a modern gaze. The way you begin with the destruction of the earth and finish with the love two people can share as everything around them is going up in flames--it's just simply amazing. Instant favorite. :heart:
thank you so much, Jay. Your comments mean a lot to me. And thank you for the fav too! :heart:
PulseofExistence Dec 7, 2009  Student Writer
The pleasure is all mine. :)
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